“catch-up” mode is a constant
I sent an email yesterday, apologising profusely for the fact that my reply was three weeks late. I feel like I’m in constant “catch-up” mode at the moment and I can’t see it changing any time soon. In fact, if anything, I’m only going to get more delayed.
I’m well aware that the next few weeks will be slightly turbulent; there’s still a lot that needs to be done before the removalists arrive in a fortnight. Then, of course, there’s the unpacking, the settling, the new routines and…the lead up to Christmas.
Ever-growing lists and imminent change would usually have me in a tizz but instead I’m choosing to embrace a different perspective. Whilst spontaneous bursts of panic can only be expected, I’m largely ok with everything that’s going on. Pregnancy has a definite grounding effect on me; yes, I have more physical weight but I’m also more likely to succumb to a more leisurely pace – out of both necessity and choice.
I’ve also been adopting a few techniques to ensure that the gigantic lists don’t grow out of control:
– my energy levels do limit me so whilst I’m respectful of my body I’m also sensible about how the practical, day-to-day tasks can get done. The 15-minute-rule has been a lifesaver – always followed by a sit-down with a big glass of water.
– I’m recognising that I have to shift a few things around in order to complete the necessary and maintain a level of calm and happiness. I suppose this is another way of saying I can’t do it/have it all – and that’s ok. This is ultimately about recognising priorities.
– I get up early (regardless of how difficult it can be) and get things done before school drop-off – washing out (and another load on), dishwasher stacked, lunchbox ingredients packed away. It’s simple chores like this that take up all my child-free time if I let them. Knowing that the necessary is out of the way when I get home from school ensures I can spend my time productively; packing, working, resting.
– I go to bed early because otherwise I’m useless. Goodness, the amount of sleep required during pregnancy is unbelievable!
– I’m spending less time online and as a result, I’m more productive when I am working or blogging. I tend not to get lost in the sea of superfluous when my time is restricted. This may be why I’m weeks behind on emails but I feel like I’m more engaged in real life – a very good thing.
Perhaps the most profound realisation I’ve had over the past few weeks is that I’m never going to get to the bottom of my list. This is, I believe, the reality of motherhood and yet it isn’t easy to accept (especially for those who thrive on productivity and perfection). It’s not the first time I’ve discussed this and it probably won’t be the last but my goodness, it’s a relief when I come back to that place of acceptance; the list is going to keep on growing and the best I can do is take it one tick at a time.
If you feel like you’re in constant catch-up mode it’s probably best to accept that for now, it is normal.