be mindful of where you are

You know those moments when you realise that things must change? I often have them on the drive to school; a moment of reflection after a hurried morning, a split-second between answering questions and planning ahead where I exhale and reevaluate.

Last week, on Tuesday and Wednesday and Thursday morning, I felt rushed and tired and haggard. The ever-so-slight ache in my ear and tickle in my throat hinted at a seasonal cold and the thought of forty unread emails had me in a slight panic. There were still boxes to unpack and wardrobes to sort and it was started to feel like I would never find some semblance of order.

So I went home, made ginger tea, rubbed lavender oil into my jaw (to relax and release) and I booked in a yoga class for Saturday morning while simultaneously texting Daniel to let him know that on Saturday mornings from here on in, he was in charge.

By 8:30am on Saturday I was out the door, rejuvenated by the mere thought of an hour or so on the mat. The studio was empty when I arrived and, as I always do, I questioned why it had taken me so long to get back there. Why had it taken me so long to put an hour aside for me?

The class began and my teacher spoke these words:

“Practise mindfully from where you are now, not from where you want to be.”
Or not from where I once was.
Yoga as a mum-of-three is very different to what it was two years ago, let alone pre-motherhood. And try as I might, letting go of ego while rising and falling in sun salutations is difficult. So instead I focused on the opportunity to be there (here!), moving on a mat without food requests, boob requests or quarrels.
How marvellous is the realisation that my body remembered those asanas, that it wanted to go deep into a twist or up into a shoulder stand. Yes, I felt the extra weight around my middle, the weakness of my core and the busyness of my mind but I also recognised the flow of my breath, the strength of my legs and the stillness of my gaze.
Yesterday I felt my practice across my shoulders and in the backs of my legs but perhaps the most profound effect was on my perspective. To go about my day mindful of where I am now, not from where I want to be is something I’ve struggled with these past few months as Percy has become more demanding, work is a constant and moving house threw a spanner in the works.

Of course, I know all of this. It’s knowledge buried deep in the mind, quietened by the chatter of parenthood. But today I’m grateful for the gentle reminder. Perhaps you are, too.* mala created by my beautiful friend, Tamara. See more at Arjuna Malas

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Showing 4 comments
  • Malayka

    Oh how much I needed to read this post. I won't write much more than that other than to say THANK YOU for this beautiful reminder. xx

  • M

    Yes I am grateful for the reminder! Thank you!!

  • mon_and_mia

    I have finally made time to get to a weekly yoga class. I've been to two classes now and i already feel a difference-emotionally, physically and spiritually. It was just what I've needed to help get my anxiety under control which has been creeping up on me. Why i waited for so many years I'm not sure? I felt like i didn't really deserve me time i suppose? A happier more relaxed wife and mummy is just what we all need here though.

  • Reply

    I am trying to just live in the moment for the next few weeks as I finish the uni semester, get ready to finish work and take some leave before our first baby arrives. While I am ready to just be I need to get through the exams and a few more weeks of work by staying in the now not daydreaming of what is to come. I am doing a pregnancy yoga class and loving it.

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